Really getting inside my head
|Meteor crater between Flagstaff and Winslow, AZ taken on my Epic Road Trip|
To be honest, sometimes there is just so much in my head that I need an outlet before it explodes (or I do)--and writing is that outlet.
I've always wanted to be a writer. In third grade, I wrote a sequel to The Secret of Nimh and tried writing my own version of the Laura Ingalls Wilder stories. Turns out I'm a better editor. But I still need to write to get my voice heard, even if it's just by me.
I've been journaling since age 12 at the recommendation of a counselor. I wasn't adjusting well to my parents' divorce, puberty, and everything else a 12-year-old introvert goes through. My father saw that since I wouldn't actually talk to someone about what was going on in my head (If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!), I needed a constructive outlet before I did something drastic. I still have that journal and the many others that came after.
With my first computer, I was able to create a locked journal that I didn't have to worry about any snooping relatives getting into. In college, I created my first website--on Geocities. I would take the time to hand-code long essays instead of quick blurbs (the WYSIWYG editor was horrible!).
And then came Blogger and Livejournal. No more hand-coding pages! I could focus on getting my thoughts out. At the time, I would still write longhand (usually on breaks at work) and edit as I typed it up. Self-censorship was high on my list back then. Not so much anymore. But neither are my thoughts as deeply personal and revealing--mostly because I know that there are more people reading my blog and I only want to bare my soul to those I trust.
Luckily, I have plenty of hobbies that I like to share about, as well as stories about my kids and travelogues. So I blog about books, movies, podcasts, cooking and every now and then politics or history when some
I think that's the real reason I write. Before twitter, my blog had maybe three regular readers. Good friends who I rarely had the chance to talk to on the phone, but they wanted to keep tabs on me. These days I know many more pop in and a few stick around for more than a few posts.
Plain and simple, I need to blog to get the stories, the pain, the adventures, and the voices in my head out on "paper".