Mamavation Monday : Skinny B*tch

Yesterday I was scrolling through tweets of friends of friends, looking for new people to follow and generally "eavesdropping" on interesting conversations. I came across a tweet from a woman who seems to exude confidence and attitude. She was complaining about being 5'10", weighing a buck and a quarter, and denying herself some comfort food. PUH-LEAZE!

My first thought was "You're kidding right? Even Liv Tyler told someone to shove it when they wanted her below 130lbs. 135-150lbs is a healthy weight for someone 5'10".

My second thought was "Your boyfriend must like the pre-pubescent boy look," - not kind, I know, but damn,  "no cushion for the pushin'" because every other tweet from this woman was about how much sex she gets. I needed a little snark to offset my third thought -- the inevitable "skinny b*itch". I don't like being jealous. It means I need a reality check.

I can relate to being the skinny bitch.  I used to be 115lbs. I'm 5'8". I was always trying to gain weight. I ate like a horse. Even after giving birth to the Teen I maintained at 120lbs and then went back to almost 110lbs because of stress. My grandmother threatened to put me in the hospital and let me eat a half a sweet potato pie by MYSELF! Practically unheard of in my family. I miss those days.

After moving to Oregon in the late '90s and freezing my butt off my first year, I ate and ate and ate and didn't exercise, it still took me two years to get to 135lbs. I finally had a little cushion. And then my 30s hit and well, stress doesn't make the weight fall off me anymore. But I hit 160lb and was told by all who love me that I didn't look sickly skinny any more, finally had some curves, etc.

I'm paying attention to what I eat now, and so very disappointed in what my body CAN'T do, because I have no strength from not exercising. And I'm overweight, borderline obese. And wanting to get back to 150 like nobody's business. When I was a "skinny bitch" it was because of my metabolism. Not because I was starving myself.

So in the end, she can starve herself, I will want to feed her sweet potato pie (not really), and continue to tell my daughter that she has the body type that is meant to be strong and that she is not skinny like I used to be and how her brother is, and hope that I can show her what it means to be HEALTHY. Not SKINNY. Because real women are strong. And have curves.