Morning Dumpster Diving

A little humor to alleviate yesterday’s seriousness (I mean really, who takes me seriously?)


As I was getting ready for work my mom sent a text asking me to bring her lunch, she had forgotten it at home. She gave me three locations where it could be. The kitchen counter, the dining table, or her room. Lunch was not in any of those places. We exchanged a few more texts and then she called me. I walked through her whole morning routine trying to find this elusive lunch bag.

Not in the kitchen, not in the fridge, not in her bathroom, not in the living room. By this time my sis had left, so we thought maybe she had grabbed it and taken it to my mom. I waited around the house for a few more while my mom called sis.

No go. Mom decides she’ll buy lunch and chalks the missing lunch up to a case of CRS (Can’t Remember Sh… Stuff). Oh yeah, at some point mom went out to her car to see if it had fallen down the passenger side well or something. Also negatory.

Once it’s decided that Mom will buy lunch I can finally leave (it’s a little after 9 by this point and I’m running late). I get to the street corner, ready to start my commute … and mom calls again. To tell me that she had taken out the recycling that morning. While holding her lunch. She thinks.

I turn around (it’s only a block or so from the entrance to her complex) kvetching the whole time about how I am about to go dumpster diving to find her lunch. Thank goodness it’s only the recycling!!! And lo and behold guess what I found while digging around empty soy milk cartons, juice cans, and other recyclables?

The missing lunch. Still intact in it’s bag. I sure am glad we rinse things out.

Delivered lunch, got a hug, and hit the road. And still made it to work mostly on time.

Moral: Don’t take your lunch out with the trash.