Happy 15th Birthday Josh!

Or how I managed to ruin my son’s birthday

Yesterday Josh turned 15. Last night I was all set to tell the world about what a great, yet small and simple celebration we had. I guess I’ll start with that.Last year and this Josh didn’t want a party because the majority of his friends are in OR and he wants to go back there for summer. He has friends here in CA, but still considers OR to be his home.

The Setup:
Josh asked me to pick him up a cake, I told him that I was stuck in traffic. What he didn’t know was that I had already ordered a cake and it was safely tucked away buckled in the back seat. There was traffic, but after I passed it – smooth sailing home. During the day Josh had also asked if he could open his present. I told him that he had to wait. Luckily he didn’t press the issue.


Cake and Presents:



We had cake and presents and Josh gave me a hug. Pretty good since he has reached the “Mom is not cool” stage. My son does love me and I love him and everyone knows it. He only shows it in private now, and rarely at that. He had asked for and gotten a new mp3 player.




From Good to Bad:


After cake and presents Josh went back to his room to play WoW. And dropped an F*Bomb in front of his grandmother. So, S.O.P is to wash your mouth out with soap. My kid hasn’t had to wash his mouth out with soap since he was five. I guess it was time to re-learn his lesson. That would have been fine and dandy except he chose to smirk at me and even talk and ask how long he had to keep the soap in his mouth (we have two hand soaps and he chose Bath and Body Works Japanese Cherry Blossom Foaming Hand Soap). He shouldn’t have smirked. After rinsing I told him to drop and give me 40 pushups.


“But Mom, I can’t do 40 pushups.”

“Too bad, you’re not getting back on WoW until you do 40 pushups.”

*sigh*

Mom counting: 1,2,3, … 20. Josh collapses and says, “I really can’t do 40.”

“Sure you can, and you aren’t getting back on WoW.”

“Ok” does 5 more. I can see his arms shaking, but when you get me to the end of my patience I can be a hard-ass (pardon my French). He got to 29 and practically collapsed.
I finally have mercy on my poor child, it is his birthday after all, and tell him he can do the rest girl-style. All cocky-like he says “Oh that’s easy” and proceeds to have the WORST form I have ever seen on a male or female. I proceed to try to adjust his butt with my foot. My foot connects and down he goes.

But not with his butt. My son is a flat-assed as I am flat-chested. There ain’t nothing there. I had accidentally got my poor son right in the family jewels. And then I made him do 5 more push-ups.

I did get him an ice-pack…

Later:

He’s cussing again. I took away the mic. Apparently it’s hard to go on raids without a mic.


Happy Birthday, Josh. I love you. Really, I do.