Saturday was a bust
Ever have one of those days where you just want to curl into a ball and hide from the world? Well, that was me Saturday afternoon. I didn't plan on it being that way. In fact, I had all sorts of plans for being productive and useful and "getting things done" that just didn't happen. First, I had left some flexibility in my schedule just in case I got to go to the "ALL 80's ALL DAY Skate event at Quiksilver in Huntington Beach with Tony Hawk, Christian Hosoi & more" courtesy of Rock Da Mullet. I thought Josh would want to go -- mom got clarification, Josh wants to go to skate events where he actually gets to skate some -- and the timing was all off. I guess that worked out, because, can you imagine me having a full-blown, out-of-the-blue anxiety attack at a skate event??? Me neither, and I don't want to!
I should have noticed that something was off because I was disoriented and tired all day long. I mean really tired and disoriented, but maybe that's why I didn't notice. It didn't help that I went to bed with a migraine and woke up with one too. I think I am grinding my teeth in my sleep again.
After walking the dogs and letting RockDaMullet know that I wasn't going to make it, I decided to hit the post office and get my mail situation cleared up. That didn't happen because even though I said I was going to do it about 11:30 AM I didn't leave the house till after 1:00 PM. Part of that is because I had no motivation and got sucked into Into The Blue on TNT. And then Britney's "For The Record". Luckily I don't watch MTV that much so I was able to pull myself away finally.
So after getting a box at a local UPS store,I sent out a few emails from my phone (I really do feel naked without the thing these days, but I hardly ever make an actual phone call) .. where was I? Oh yeah, I sent out emails to a few people who had told me that mail had been returned with my new mailing address. Then I called Josh and he didn't want to go grocery shopping, so I went alone. I tried a new Albertson's, the one off 2nd street because I also wanted to hit Trader Joe's. I never did make it to Trader Joe's. After some awesome savings, I loaded up the car and proceeded to have a small mental break-down, also known as an anxiety attack.
Despite tweeting about it, yes, it was real. I can feel them coming on, but this one hit hard and fast. I sat in the parking lot for over an hour wanting to crawl into a ball. But my Fit is kinda small to do that, so I just sat, and cried, and tried to breathe, and tweeted to take my mind off things. I would really like to thank @amhurst, @tinatessina, and @thelaughingimp for talking to me during that episode. I think it went faster because I had immediate feedback that I wasn't alone.
Finally around 4 something I was able to start up the car and head home. We got the groceries put away and then I went and crawled into my blankets. I needed a cocoon. I spent the rest of the night in bed, watching TV and tweeting. Because you know, it doesn't take a whole lot mentally to tweet.