FW: A Different Mastercard Commercial :)

Did I post this already?

Annette
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I find it interesting that the meanest life, the poorest existence, is attributed to God's will, but as human beings become more affluent, as their living standard and style begin to ascend the material scale, God descends the scale of responsibility at commensurate speed.
--Maya Angelou, 1970

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Jack wakes up with a huge hangover the night after a business social function.

He forces himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And next to that, a single red rose!

Jack sits up in bed and sees his clothing in front of him, all cleaned and pressed.

He looks around the room and sees that everything is in perfect order - spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, but cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. There’s a note on the table:

“Honey, breakfast is on the stove. I left early to go shopping. Love you!!”

Jack stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning paper. His college student son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, “Son - what happened last night?”

“Well,” he replied, “you came home after 3 a.m., drunk and out of your mind like a frat boy. You broke the coffee table, puked in the hallway and got that black eye when you ran into the door.”

“So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, and I have a rose and breakfast waiting for me?”

His son replies, “Oh, THAT! Well, Mom dragged you off the bedroom and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed,

“Leave me alone, you $lut! I’m MARRIED!!!”

Broken table - $200.00
Hot breakfast $5.00
Red Rose - $3.00
Two aspirins - $.25
Saying the right thing at the right time - Priceless!