Disappointment of the Day
This one has been on my mind since yesterday, and I wasn't quite sure how to phrase it. Bluntly, I think. I am really disappointed and confused by the leadership of this trip.
Well, I can't say that unequivocally, but the lack of communication has me miffed. And the reversal of position, if one indeed did take place has got my protective mama hackles up.
Josh really misses his biological dad. I can understand him wanting to take advantage of the fact that he was going to be in Southern California and have (theoretically) a break, a day of FUN. Last Friday he called me from Calvary Tijuana letting me know that they finally had a small break, he was ok if tired, looking forward to the festival on Saturday and excited to see his dad on Monday.
Hold up, wait a minute!
The day he left (July 22) Josh asked for his dad's number and I gave it to him after asking him what for and urging him, nay, telling him outright to clear it with the leader before he invited his dad anywhere. Josh said he would. On Friday's (July 28) phone call, he said that Mike was going to meet them at Knott's Berry Farm on Monday (July 31). I asked if he had cleared it he said that he did (must have since he was using the leader's cell phone to call both me and his dad, right?). Fast forward to Sunday (July 30). A VERY tired Josh calls me to let me know they are back in the States, he's ready to come home, is bringing Manzanita home, wants to do it again next year and that he wasn't going to see his dad because leadership had decided that his dad would take him away from the group (at this he sounded pretty beat. I wasn't sure if it was being tired or the emotions being kept in check).
HELLO!?!?!?!?!?!?!? Hrm, this is a missions trip, is it not? Why not MINISTER to the guy and INVITE him to stay with the group? WAIT!!! Why not TALK to him first and see what he plans to do? By the way, I called Mike to see if anyone had told him what was up (they hadn't) and he totally planned on hanging out with the group. He was actually looking forward to seeing Josh (bestill my heart, but there it is). I can understand some trepidation, but why not call me and get my ok and talk to Mike and let him know what the boundaries were if there were any qualms?
Though, now that I think about it, I wonder if Josh didn't call Mike in the hopes that he would show up any way ... darn me and my meddling self. But back to what caused the disappointment....
Josh had to end his call to me abruptly on Sunday night. Sounded like another call was coming in or the battery dying. I called back a few hours later to ask the leader if 1) Josh had discussed it with him prior to inviting his dad, 2) what did he say 3) would he consider changing his mind since Mike had already arranged to take the day off and was intending of staying with Josh's group and not infringing on anyone's authority (I had talked to Mike Sunday night, as far as he knew he was going to Knott's and just needed to know when and where to meet) .... I left two messages. I called the hostess the next day around 9:30 AM (thinking that everyone was wiped and since she lives near Knott's that they wouldn't leave around 8 or whatever, I guess I was wrong) , called the leader's cell again ... nothing. At that point I felt like people were ignoring my number as it appeared on caller ID. I just wanted the straight story. Did Josh ask permission or not? Did the leader give permission and then change his mind? Clear up the confusion PLEASE!!!!
But my boy comes home tonight. If I get a decent paying job, maybe we can go down for a few days over winter break.
Well, I can't say that unequivocally, but the lack of communication has me miffed. And the reversal of position, if one indeed did take place has got my protective mama hackles up.
Josh really misses his biological dad. I can understand him wanting to take advantage of the fact that he was going to be in Southern California and have (theoretically) a break, a day of FUN. Last Friday he called me from Calvary Tijuana letting me know that they finally had a small break, he was ok if tired, looking forward to the festival on Saturday and excited to see his dad on Monday.
Hold up, wait a minute!
The day he left (July 22) Josh asked for his dad's number and I gave it to him after asking him what for and urging him, nay, telling him outright to clear it with the leader before he invited his dad anywhere. Josh said he would. On Friday's (July 28) phone call, he said that Mike was going to meet them at Knott's Berry Farm on Monday (July 31). I asked if he had cleared it he said that he did (must have since he was using the leader's cell phone to call both me and his dad, right?). Fast forward to Sunday (July 30). A VERY tired Josh calls me to let me know they are back in the States, he's ready to come home, is bringing Manzanita home, wants to do it again next year and that he wasn't going to see his dad because leadership had decided that his dad would take him away from the group (at this he sounded pretty beat. I wasn't sure if it was being tired or the emotions being kept in check).
HELLO!?!?!?!?!?!?!? Hrm, this is a missions trip, is it not? Why not MINISTER to the guy and INVITE him to stay with the group? WAIT!!! Why not TALK to him first and see what he plans to do? By the way, I called Mike to see if anyone had told him what was up (they hadn't) and he totally planned on hanging out with the group. He was actually looking forward to seeing Josh (bestill my heart, but there it is). I can understand some trepidation, but why not call me and get my ok and talk to Mike and let him know what the boundaries were if there were any qualms?
Though, now that I think about it, I wonder if Josh didn't call Mike in the hopes that he would show up any way ... darn me and my meddling self. But back to what caused the disappointment....
Josh had to end his call to me abruptly on Sunday night. Sounded like another call was coming in or the battery dying. I called back a few hours later to ask the leader if 1) Josh had discussed it with him prior to inviting his dad, 2) what did he say 3) would he consider changing his mind since Mike had already arranged to take the day off and was intending of staying with Josh's group and not infringing on anyone's authority (I had talked to Mike Sunday night, as far as he knew he was going to Knott's and just needed to know when and where to meet) .... I left two messages. I called the hostess the next day around 9:30 AM (thinking that everyone was wiped and since she lives near Knott's that they wouldn't leave around 8 or whatever, I guess I was wrong) , called the leader's cell again ... nothing. At that point I felt like people were ignoring my number as it appeared on caller ID. I just wanted the straight story. Did Josh ask permission or not? Did the leader give permission and then change his mind? Clear up the confusion PLEASE!!!!
But my boy comes home tonight. If I get a decent paying job, maybe we can go down for a few days over winter break.
Technorati Tags: church, mission trips, family, conflict avoidance, Knott's Berry Farm
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